Life Coaches vs Therapists

Which one should you choose?

Can you remember feeling confused, stuck or ready to crack up? Most of us struggle on and off  with good mental health throughout our lifetimes.  I remember the year I was going through menopause,  and I thought bugs were crawling all over me.  Ha!

Good mental health affects how we think, feel and act,  determining how we handle stress and relate to others.  Oh, maybe that’s why my husband ran every time he saw me coming during “The Change” years.

But other things like trauma, abuse, brain injury, cancer, chemical imbalance, exposure to toxins before birth, drugs and alcohol can  also contribute to struggles with our mental health.  Researchers  say the pandemic and social media have played havoc with good mental health  in today’s society.

No wonder there has been a 54% increase in the number of  Life Coaches since 2019.  Although Life Coaches can be extremely beneficial  inspiring people,  helping set and achieve future goals for individuals who are pivoting careers, needing a kick start, tackling adversity, breaking bad habits, and  clarifying their life purposes, most of them  are not certified to address mental illness.

Mental health  turns into mental illness when ongoing symptoms cause too much stress and our ability to function.  In today’s world  1 in 5 people live with mental illness and 1 in 25 live with severe illnesses like schizophrenia, bi-polar disorder or major depression. 

Mental health professionals with more formal education and licensures are available to help with those bigger problems.  Counselors  and therapists  most often have Master degrees, and they use talk therapy focusing on issues stemming from the past. They also address drug & alcohol abuse, marriage problems, school concerns and provide grief counseling.  They are almost always the ones who deal with traumatic events like school shootings.  For example, my online friend Tricia Thornton, LPC/RPT is a therapist in Nashville. She has  counseled children from The Covenant School in Nashville as a result of the mass shooting there on March 27, 2023.  Tricia has written the wonderful book Blessing from Fear that will help parents empower their children.

Psychologists have  doctorates so  they can evaluate, identify, diagnose and treat major mental health issues. Since Psychiatrists are actually medical doctors,  they are the only mental health provider (in most states)  who can prescribe meds  for mental health treatment.

Personally, I think talk therapy is a wonderful tool.  Before I could get my Masters in Counseling, I had to talk to a university therapist four different times.  I’m glad to report she labeled me “normal” so I could get my degree. Surprised? Ha! More importantly, however, I learned a lot about myself just talking to her.  

I have to admit I think there may be another very  effective type of “mental health helper” : BOOK CLUBS. Yep, book clubs! 

Photo Credit: Barnes & Noble book signing in Ann Arbor many years ago

Our Book Club started over twenty years ago when some of us fell in love with Jodi Picoult’s gripping novels and surprise endings.  We have read almost all of her books by now, subscribing to her quote from My Sister’s Keeper, “You don’t love someone because they’re perfect…you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.” It didn’t take us long to realize we were in a safe place to talk, able to disagree about both the stories and our own lives. Matter-of-fact, we still tease the woman who chose Augusten Burroughs’  Running With Scissors for us to read.  In his memoir Burroughs told about his mother giving him away — to be raised by a lunatic psychiatrist.  The book was really bizarre, but it definitely relieved our stress — we giggled so much.

Many of the novels we’ve read by different authors have dealt with controversial issues like abortion, assisted suicide, eugenics, race relations, school shootings,  infidelity,  the death penalty, religious beliefs, the supernatural. They have all led to great personal insights.   Mad Honey, one of Picoult’s latest books, provoked a lot of lively discussion on LGBTQ rights and transgenderism.

And talk about extra support – one of our members recently gifted the rest of us prints of her watercolor entitled  The Book Club so we can write the titles we’ve read on the spines of her colorful books. Every time I walk by this framed picture I feel blessed.

One thing I love about our book club is the chance to regularly celebrate womanhood through literature.  I think books like Lessons  in Chemistry, The Giver of Stars and The Magnificent Lives of Marjorie Post have made us emotionally stronger.  What fun we had going to see Menopause The Musical together. Here’s a link if you need a good laugh today. I promise you men will get a kick out of it too.

I’m pretty sure you’ll never find a reference to BOOK CLUB in a psychology textbook or the American Journal of Psychiatry, but in my book it definitely refers to a provider of good mental health for me. It makes me feel better, relieves stress, gives me interesting insights, makes me emotionally stronger, provides a safe place to talk and lots of extra support — a lot like formal therapy.

In Second Glances, Picoult asked, “Did you ever walk through a room that’s packed and feel so lonely you can hardly take the next step?” Well, you might just be able to avoid that awkward feeling if you start a book club with friends.

It’ll Be OK.

My book club today

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“The human body is 90% water so basically we’re just cucumbers with anxiety.” ~The Idealist