It's funny, my mother and I are having the same conversation. She is a collector of EVERYTHING! When I suggest a purge it turns her world upside down.🙃 But, I must confess, that when we are going through her things, her face lights up, the transformation begins, she is back in that moment, re-living that time. The stories are truly magical! I believe I understand the importance of her holding on. It's a part of her, her legacy, her history....hard to ask someone to give that up. So I will stay with my mom, in all her "history" putting my angst aside. I will share her memories and listen to her stories until there are stories no more.❤
What an interesting piece! To be honest, it was very surprising to hear that the kids don't want to make sure that mom's cherished little treasures have a home when the time comes. I am like you. I surround myself with things that have special memories and can say with certainty that this is the stuff that gets me through life. I do work hard to keep clutter at a minimum, but it's not easy! Ah, Nostalgia. I couldn't live without it. DO I HAVE A SPECIAL MOMENTO THAT I CHERISH? Don't know where to begin, I have so many. I'm looking around trying to narrow it down to just one...hmmm. OK, the Crucifix that was above my parents' bed for the entire duration of their marriage. Sorry, I am tearing up a little at that one....
Yep, I shed a few tears now & again, knowing most of my older relatives are gone & there's no one left to ask questions. I'm also getting into genealogy more as I get older. Love finding about my "roots." It's sounds as if that Crucifix blessed your family for a lot of years. Wishing you continued blessings...
My mom was not a saver, I am not a saver, my husband is a saver. I have already apologized to my kids for what they will have to deal with in our garage and shop. Those are areas I take no responsibility for. This made me laugh a lot!
Totally relate! And we don't have any children to accept or reject our treasures! Sometimes when I'm dusting I get a melancholy feeling that this is all going into a dumpster. Then I give my head a shake and decide... so what. In the meantime these things bring me happy thoughts of connections and good days gone by.
I too, am a collector of things. Grandma's sweater, dad's flannel shirt, mom's rings, Great Grandma's serving dishes are disbursed throughout my home. Some of these items can be found in an old chest that belonged to Mark's family and some I see everyday in the china closet in my dining room. I love to spend a few moments every once in while, usually when I am deep cleaning, holding them for a moment and just remembering the person it belonged to. You should see me at Christmas time decorating the tree. It takes forever! Because with each ornament there is also a story. So I find myself sitting and starring off into space in some wonderful memory of days gone by. I can just picture my children shaking their heads when they pull some of this stuff out to throw away. But maybe when they come across the love letters Mark wrote to me before we were married they might pause a moment and realize they are here because of this love. Maybe I could leave them notes on all of the things that meant so much to me and why I saved them. ;0) lol
I love the idea of leaving notes! Not only leave them to your children but Grandchildren too. As many of us have done this I am sure , we collect special Christmas ornaments for each of your children. I have not been able emotionally to get out these ornaments since my daughter’s death. Each Christmas I don’t have courage to face the pain, I am working on positive memories and I do believe if I can write things down as I unwrap these treasures it will help me cope with her absence. Writing memories and feelings down really does help! Thank all of you for your suggestions and sharing your love and wisdom.
Unfortunately by the time our parents are getting the stuff out of their house, or when we have to do it for them, our houses are already full. We are all pretty spoiled I guess. I moved 9 times first 9 years we were married. It helps to keep the clutter down….but now we have stayed put for close to 26 years. Time to purge, and no, they don’t want any of it😌😩
I have all special moments in my mind, my friends say that I have an elephant's memory... My style is minimalist, I prefere have a few objets because I'm a cleaning fanatic. I don't think my son would take some things from the house, because today's apartments are very small. When I go to my mother's or mother-in-law's house I can spend hours looking at the number of memories they have and listen to the meaning of each one. Thank you Jan.
Hi Elizabeth ~ I see you are a teacher in Lima, Peru. Thanks for reading my blog. I was wondering if you ever heard of the non-profit Voices4Peru? Daniel Klopp, one of the founders & administrators of the group, is one of my relatives by marriage. He has dedicated his life to it. https://www.facebook.com/v4peru
Yes, I am a primary school teacher and I like my job very much. I m very interested to know about Daniel and this organization. I will check his Fb. Is Daniel living in Lima right now? Thanks Jan, I like very much your post. 🌼
I taught high school/college English & speech for nearly 40 years. We are soul sisters. Here is a link to Daniel's personal FB page. https://www.facebook.com/daniel.m.klopp (Daniel's grandpa was married to my mom. )
Thank you Jan, we have very much in commun, I teach lower school (first grade). I already follow him in Fb. Congratulations to Daniel for his great work helping poor people in Lima.
I’m not a Garage sale person, though my husband can find some good deals. Though sometimes I wonder where are we going to put the stuff he gets LOL. Oh well we would find a place for it somewhere as always.
I, too, am a “collector” of precious treasures that can be handed down to my children. After losing my daughter I knew that my son would not be interested in most of the treasures I had been saving for her nor would he probably be interested in his future collected treasures I have for him! I think the idea of using them now and enjoy them is genius!! Donating works also!
My friends tell me the same thing. I do not have children to leave anything to. My nieces and nephew, I know will not want anything of my stuff. I did give my nieces some pieces of jewelry that they each wear. They all have their own unique style. I have a few things from my parents. An old raggedy t-shirt of my dad’s and his shields from when he was a fireman. I wear the t-shirt on cold days under a sweatshirt and his shields were framed and they are hanging in my TV room. I have my mom’s jewelry and a favorite ceramic piece of a cardinal that she loved. She gave me her nurse’s cap, scissors, and Florence Nightengale pledge, when I became a nurse. I guess I am one of those nostalgic women who will hold on to memories and feel my parents spirits when I wear a t-shirt or a pair of earrings.
I often wonder the same thing having 3 boys. I don’t see them wanting anything that I have accumulated over the years. It’s kind of heartbreaking, but true. So, in the meantime I’m going to figure out if anyone else in my family wants the stuff or sell it, I guess.
Like you I doubt if my boys will want any of my stuff. So as I still have things we got for wedding presents 53+ years ago I am going to use them and if they get broken well so be it. Same with things handed down from my mother and grandmother. Some could be antiques so maybe I will sell them.
Jan, that was great! I have MANY sets of glassware and dishes. (I just couldn’t stop myself!). When my friends come over and admire or are moved by an item, I try to remember that and am going to place notes with the sets they loved so they can be given to that friend when I’m gone. Maybe even before then! But for now, like you said, they remind me of the meals or tea times we shared which were so precious. My dear friend, who is 89, gave me a teacup passed down through her family that is over 100 years old. I treasure the teacup, but more so that she I trusted it to me. Where do you live? I think if you were close we would be good friends. I, too, loved Downton Abbey. My husband and I have a picture of us in front of Highclare Castle. Thanks for suggesting this post to me.
I have many things of my Mothers, her Mothers, and others who went before us. I do plan to eventually sort through it all and weigh each item in my hear before deciding it’s fate. I’ve always been a sentimental pack rat but the minimalist life style does definitely have an appeal. I will definitely be keeping some things, especially things the kids may want some day. I just can’t keep everything.
It's funny, my mother and I are having the same conversation. She is a collector of EVERYTHING! When I suggest a purge it turns her world upside down.🙃 But, I must confess, that when we are going through her things, her face lights up, the transformation begins, she is back in that moment, re-living that time. The stories are truly magical! I believe I understand the importance of her holding on. It's a part of her, her legacy, her history....hard to ask someone to give that up. So I will stay with my mom, in all her "history" putting my angst aside. I will share her memories and listen to her stories until there are stories no more.❤
Bless you, Lisa!!! You are giving your mom a gift bigger than you know. xoxo
What an interesting piece! To be honest, it was very surprising to hear that the kids don't want to make sure that mom's cherished little treasures have a home when the time comes. I am like you. I surround myself with things that have special memories and can say with certainty that this is the stuff that gets me through life. I do work hard to keep clutter at a minimum, but it's not easy! Ah, Nostalgia. I couldn't live without it. DO I HAVE A SPECIAL MOMENTO THAT I CHERISH? Don't know where to begin, I have so many. I'm looking around trying to narrow it down to just one...hmmm. OK, the Crucifix that was above my parents' bed for the entire duration of their marriage. Sorry, I am tearing up a little at that one....
Yep, I shed a few tears now & again, knowing most of my older relatives are gone & there's no one left to ask questions. I'm also getting into genealogy more as I get older. Love finding about my "roots." It's sounds as if that Crucifix blessed your family for a lot of years. Wishing you continued blessings...
My mom was not a saver, I am not a saver, my husband is a saver. I have already apologized to my kids for what they will have to deal with in our garage and shop. Those are areas I take no responsibility for. This made me laugh a lot!
Oh boy! You're probably like my husband. The looks he gives me when I start spreading over into his garage and office. Ha Ha!
Totally relate! And we don't have any children to accept or reject our treasures! Sometimes when I'm dusting I get a melancholy feeling that this is all going into a dumpster. Then I give my head a shake and decide... so what. In the meantime these things bring me happy thoughts of connections and good days gone by.
Yes. I’ve decided that too. 😊 ❤️
I too, am a collector of things. Grandma's sweater, dad's flannel shirt, mom's rings, Great Grandma's serving dishes are disbursed throughout my home. Some of these items can be found in an old chest that belonged to Mark's family and some I see everyday in the china closet in my dining room. I love to spend a few moments every once in while, usually when I am deep cleaning, holding them for a moment and just remembering the person it belonged to. You should see me at Christmas time decorating the tree. It takes forever! Because with each ornament there is also a story. So I find myself sitting and starring off into space in some wonderful memory of days gone by. I can just picture my children shaking their heads when they pull some of this stuff out to throw away. But maybe when they come across the love letters Mark wrote to me before we were married they might pause a moment and realize they are here because of this love. Maybe I could leave them notes on all of the things that meant so much to me and why I saved them. ;0) lol
Kathy ~ leaving notes is a great idea! xoxo
I love the idea of leaving notes! Not only leave them to your children but Grandchildren too. As many of us have done this I am sure , we collect special Christmas ornaments for each of your children. I have not been able emotionally to get out these ornaments since my daughter’s death. Each Christmas I don’t have courage to face the pain, I am working on positive memories and I do believe if I can write things down as I unwrap these treasures it will help me cope with her absence. Writing memories and feelings down really does help! Thank all of you for your suggestions and sharing your love and wisdom.
Unfortunately by the time our parents are getting the stuff out of their house, or when we have to do it for them, our houses are already full. We are all pretty spoiled I guess. I moved 9 times first 9 years we were married. It helps to keep the clutter down….but now we have stayed put for close to 26 years. Time to purge, and no, they don’t want any of it😌😩
I have all special moments in my mind, my friends say that I have an elephant's memory... My style is minimalist, I prefere have a few objets because I'm a cleaning fanatic. I don't think my son would take some things from the house, because today's apartments are very small. When I go to my mother's or mother-in-law's house I can spend hours looking at the number of memories they have and listen to the meaning of each one. Thank you Jan.
Hi Elizabeth ~ I see you are a teacher in Lima, Peru. Thanks for reading my blog. I was wondering if you ever heard of the non-profit Voices4Peru? Daniel Klopp, one of the founders & administrators of the group, is one of my relatives by marriage. He has dedicated his life to it. https://www.facebook.com/v4peru
Yes, I am a primary school teacher and I like my job very much. I m very interested to know about Daniel and this organization. I will check his Fb. Is Daniel living in Lima right now? Thanks Jan, I like very much your post. 🌼
I taught high school/college English & speech for nearly 40 years. We are soul sisters. Here is a link to Daniel's personal FB page. https://www.facebook.com/daniel.m.klopp (Daniel's grandpa was married to my mom. )
Thank you Jan, we have very much in commun, I teach lower school (first grade). I already follow him in Fb. Congratulations to Daniel for his great work helping poor people in Lima.
Thank you for following Daniel. Perhaps you will meet each other someday. He has had many struggles there, but is so dedicated. xoxo
I'm glad I met you, your messages are very funny. 😊I hope meet Daniel too.
One man's treasure is another man's trash... or in the words of John Sebastian " Why must every generation think they're folks are square"
Thanks Jan loved your post. Though
I’m not a Garage sale person, though my husband can find some good deals. Though sometimes I wonder where are we going to put the stuff he gets LOL. Oh well we would find a place for it somewhere as always.
I, too, am a “collector” of precious treasures that can be handed down to my children. After losing my daughter I knew that my son would not be interested in most of the treasures I had been saving for her nor would he probably be interested in his future collected treasures I have for him! I think the idea of using them now and enjoy them is genius!! Donating works also!
Must be your oldest child 😉
Oh shoot! I didn't think you'd read this. Ha Ha!
My friends tell me the same thing. I do not have children to leave anything to. My nieces and nephew, I know will not want anything of my stuff. I did give my nieces some pieces of jewelry that they each wear. They all have their own unique style. I have a few things from my parents. An old raggedy t-shirt of my dad’s and his shields from when he was a fireman. I wear the t-shirt on cold days under a sweatshirt and his shields were framed and they are hanging in my TV room. I have my mom’s jewelry and a favorite ceramic piece of a cardinal that she loved. She gave me her nurse’s cap, scissors, and Florence Nightengale pledge, when I became a nurse. I guess I am one of those nostalgic women who will hold on to memories and feel my parents spirits when I wear a t-shirt or a pair of earrings.
Elaine ~ you're my kind of woman! xoxo
I often wonder the same thing having 3 boys. I don’t see them wanting anything that I have accumulated over the years. It’s kind of heartbreaking, but true. So, in the meantime I’m going to figure out if anyone else in my family wants the stuff or sell it, I guess.
Wrap it up as Christmas presents & see what they do. ha ha!
Like you I doubt if my boys will want any of my stuff. So as I still have things we got for wedding presents 53+ years ago I am going to use them and if they get broken well so be it. Same with things handed down from my mother and grandmother. Some could be antiques so maybe I will sell them.
That's what I'm going to do too, Teresa. I'm going to use "my stuff" and enjoy all of it while it lasts. I kinda like that my house tells my story.
Jan, that was great! I have MANY sets of glassware and dishes. (I just couldn’t stop myself!). When my friends come over and admire or are moved by an item, I try to remember that and am going to place notes with the sets they loved so they can be given to that friend when I’m gone. Maybe even before then! But for now, like you said, they remind me of the meals or tea times we shared which were so precious. My dear friend, who is 89, gave me a teacup passed down through her family that is over 100 years old. I treasure the teacup, but more so that she I trusted it to me. Where do you live? I think if you were close we would be good friends. I, too, loved Downton Abbey. My husband and I have a picture of us in front of Highclare Castle. Thanks for suggesting this post to me.
I have many things of my Mothers, her Mothers, and others who went before us. I do plan to eventually sort through it all and weigh each item in my hear before deciding it’s fate. I’ve always been a sentimental pack rat but the minimalist life style does definitely have an appeal. I will definitely be keeping some things, especially things the kids may want some day. I just can’t keep everything.